She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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