i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
