i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
