He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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