If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
