I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
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