It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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