coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
