You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
