I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
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