yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
This baby is an asshole
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
