So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
