So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
