Your tits are I can't wait for
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
