Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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