a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize