ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Girls should come with a carfax report
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
