I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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