let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
