Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize