We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
