Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
