I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize