How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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