Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
