i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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