This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
