so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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