I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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