Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
