please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
that may or may not have been my penis.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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