So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
