Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
