We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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