Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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