Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
