I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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