He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
