yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Randomize
