omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
It's just like the Real World with babies
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
