i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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