He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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