ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
