Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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