Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize