just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
