I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
