gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
