Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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