Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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